Author(s): Richard Templar
"THE RULES OF PARENTING""A personal code for bringing up happy, confident children" Some parents make it all look easy.They always seem to know the right things to do and say, however tricky the situation. They have a seemingly instinctive ability to raise happy, confident, well-balanced children. Is there something they know that we don't? Is it something that we could learn? The answer is a resounding yes. They know "The Rules of Parenting". "The Rules of Parenting" are the golden principles and behaviours that will guide you smoothly through the challenges of raising children. They will help your children to handle themselves well, enjoy life, respect others, be decent and thoughtful, and to stand up for what they believe in. You'll get more out of being a parent, and they'll become all they can be. "The Rules of Parenting" puts everything in perspective, you in control and your children on the path to becoming successful, independent adults. There's no job more important than being a parent. How good could you be? First published 2008.
"A realistic book that recognises the challenges all parents face and lays out a number of strategies to help you raise happy healthy children." Derby Evening Telegraph
Richard Templar is the author of the international bestselling Rules books. Over 2 million people around the world have enjoyed and now play by Richard Templar's Rules. The complete list of titles is as follows: Rules of Life, Rules of Work, Rules of Management, Rules of Wealth, Rules of Parenting and Rules of Love.
Introduction Rules for staying sane *Relax *No one is perfect *Know what you're good at *Almost any rule can be broken occasionally *Don't try to do everything *You don't have to follow every piece of advice you get (including this one) *It's normal to want to escape *You're allowed to hide from your kids *Parents are people too *Don't ignore your relationship with your partner Attitude Rules *Love is not enough * Every recipe needs different ingredients *Look pleased to see them *Treat your child with respect *Enjoy their company *Being tidy isn't as important as you think *Good parenting is calculated risk taking *Keep your worries to yourself *See things from their point of view *Parenting is not a competitive sport Everyday Rules *Let them get on with it *Teach them to think for themselves *Use praise wisely *Know the value of boundaries *Bribery doesn't have to be bad *Moods are catching *You're setting their eating patterns for life *Communicate *Set clear targets *Don't be a nag Discipline Rules *Present a united front *Carrots beat sticks *Be consistent *Lighten up *Focus on the problem, not the person *Don't paint yourself into a corner *If you lose your temper, you're the loser *Apologise if you get it wrong *Let them back in *The right of expression Personality Rules *Find out what incentives work for your child *Every child should have something they know they're good at *Learn to appreciate the qualities that remind you of someone else *Look for similiarities between you *Find qualities to admire in them *Let them be better than you *Their attitude is as important as their achievements *Keep your fears and insecurities to yourself *Mind your programming *Don't try to have a perfect child Sibling Rules *Give them each other *Recognise that squabbling is healthy (within reason) *Teach them to sort out their own arguments *Work as a team *Let them entertain each other *Never compare children with each other *Different children need different rules *Don't have a favourite *Mix and match *Find each child's strengths School Rules *Schooling isn't the same as education *School comes as a package *Fight your child's corner *Bullying is always serious *Teach them to stand up for themselves *Put up with friends of theirs you don't like *Remember you're their parent, not their teacher *Don't mollycoddle them *Let up the pressure *They have to live with their choices (and it's ok) Teenage Rules *Don't Panic *Remember Newton's Third Law *Give them a voice *Don't look under the mattress *Running around after them doesn't help anybody *Don't stand in front of a speeding train *Yelling isn't the answer *Everything comes with strings *Show some respect for the things they care about *Adopt a healthy attitude to sex Crisis Rules *Don't use your kids as ammunition *Let them cope in their own way *Being younger doesn't necessarily speed everything up *The aftershock can last forever *Tell them what's going on *Teach them to fail successfully *It's better to agree than to be right *All your actions speak louder than any of your words *Make sure they know they're priority no. 1 *You can't fix everything Grown-up Rules *Back off *Wait until they ask for advice *Treat them as adults *Don't try to be their best friend *Encourage them regardless *Leave the strings off *Don't guilt-trip them *Remember they still need you *It's not your fault *Once a parent, always a parent